On Love and Relationship

Wag nyo kong awayin sa maasim na isinusulat ko.  Eto ang epekto ng more than 17 months of Zero Dating.  I just wanna share my whole concept of love and relationship summarized eloquently by a poem:

After a While
by Veronica Shoffstall

After a while you learn
The subtle difference between
Holding a hand and chaining a soul

Dito ako madalas na nadadale, hahaha.  Marami kasing nagpapanggap na nagmamahal, but they mistaking to Love and to Own.  Maraming humihintong magmahal, dahil hindi sila minamahal.
I remember one time, i said, "I love you."
the other person said, "I'm sorry, I can't"
at sabi ko, "That is irrelevant.  ang sabi ko mahal kita, sinong may sabing dapat mahalin mo ako?"
and when that person smiled, our relationship continues till now, 7 years and counting.  But sure way it's different from everyone thinks. n_n

And you learn that love doesn't mean leaning
And company doesn't always mean security.
And you begin to learn
That kisses aren't contracts
And presents aren't promises

Isa lang ang lesson dito.  Wag mag-assume!  Maraming taong napa-praning pero friendship, companionship or libog lang pala ang gusto sa kanila ng iba.  Iba't-iba ang level ng pag-aasume.  Eto ay ang sumusunod.
Level 1 - Eto ang pinaka mababang level.  Ni-view lang ng crush mo ang profile mo, in-assume na na na me gusto rin xa sau.
Level 2 - Nginitian ka, at meron kayong small talks.  Feeling mo, misis ka na nya.
Level 3 - You did hang-out sa coffee shop or bars.  Tapos mang-aaway ka pag may nakita kang pinapa-cute-an nya.
Level 4 - Me "nangyari" na sa inyo isang beses after 3 bottles of beer.  Nag-eempake ka na kinabukasan to move in his apartment.
Level 5 - Highest level.  Eto ang the best.  Halos manhid ka na.  You are more than friends na, pero you still believe your less than lovers. 

Kaya para sa kin, it's better na maging manhid, kesa mag-assume (formula is assumption = expectation + disappointment + pahiya ka noh?).

And you begin to accept your defeats
With your head up and your eyes ahead
With the grace of an adult
Not the grief of a child

Eto naman ang anti-asim at anti-ampalaya lecture.  Sa tuwing maha-heartbroken ka, isang buntong hininga lang yan.  Na parang natalo sa jack-en-poi.  Sabi ni Paolo Coelho, you just need seven days to grieve, after nun, nag-iinarte ka na lang.  (Ang record ko is 3 days, hahaha).

And you learn
To build all your roads on today
Because tomorrow's ground is
Too uncertain for plans
And futures have a way
Of falling down in mid flight

Eto ang lesson ng living in the present.  Wag bayaang ma-trap sa past, wag bayaang ma-stuck sa future.  Today is a gift, that's why they call it present.

After a while you learn
That even sunshine burns if you get too much

Eto ang ipinayo ko sa girlfriend ng barkada ko na masyadong possesive.  Nagtaka sya kung bakit sya pinagpalit ng friend ko, despite ginawa nya ang lahat.  I told her, "yon ang problema mo, ginawa mo ang lahat.  $$$$, girlfriend ka lang.  hindi ka yaya, bodyguard, nanay, drinking buddy, labandera, kusinera or what-else ng barkada ko.  girlfriend ka, you should just be like one."

So you plant your own garden
And decorate your own soul
Instead of waiting
For someone to bring you flowers

Eto ang loving-yourself part, and my favorite.  Kanina i received a message from a guy whom i'm considering to date.  He noticed na parang dumadalang daw ang messages ko.  Nagpapaalam na raw ba ako?  O sumusuko?  Natatawa lang ako.  Hahaha.  Yes, i'm waiting for him na maka-move on sya from his previous relationship, but it doesn't mean na sa kanya na iikot ang mundo ko. 

And you learn
That you really can endure (Yes!)
That you are really strong (Sobra!)
And you really do have worth (Precious!)
And you learn and you learn (addict sa learning)
With every good bye you learn.

yan, goodbye daw.  sana you have learned something.

till next time.  n_n

To All the Boys

Hayz, I think hindi na ako kilala ng mga regular subscribers ko d2.  Nevertheless, I thank those who send me private messages encouraging me to blog more.  And contrary to what many believe, wala pa rin akong lovelife.  Hindi yon ang dahilan kung bakit ako busy.

Remember last time (no, not at bandcamp) I decided to work on the mountains?  I spent close to a year na malayo-layo sa sibilisasyon.  That’s during my Zero Dating Goal.  And sadly, that earned me to work on another project, sa dagat naman.  Since I got back from Japan last Feb, my career took off most of my time away from the web and over the sea.

Gladly, its just 2 batches of 3 months each that thankfully ended a couple of days ago.

This blog though is not about my career, but are character sketches of those cadets I trained for the past few months to whom I said farewell.  Here it goes:

Kambal sa Kieme

Parehas kayong magaling.  Academics at practical.  Pati sa boxing hirap ako sa inyo.  Pero masyado kayong low profile.  Salamat sa boxing, kahit masakit sa katawan, tumubo din yata ang muscles ko (dati parang pantal lang, ngayon manas na, hahaha).  Pero kahit parehas kaung magaling, magpakitang gilas pa rin kayo.  The old adage is sound, “out of sight, out of mind”.

Poker Face

Hindi tayo close, we both know that.  Siguro dahil awkward.  Maraming nakatingin at nakakahalata na I find you really good looking.  Hahaha.  Pasensya kung mejo iniisnab kita.  Kailangan yun.  Its my way to show fairness sa lahat ng mga kadete ko.  You got skills, and muka namang self-motivated.  Problem is you seem afraid of competition, or afraid of losing.  Don’t get it in the way of learning!  Whether it’s boxing, poker, or quiz bee.  You won’t win if you won’t try.

Stupid Monster

Hehehe, apir sa original number one member ng fans club ko.  It’s flattering na Idol mo ko.  Pero nung nalaman kong lagi mong tinitignan ang pictures nating dalawa after mag-jogging sa CCP… parang… ibang level yun.  Nagworry ako na baka mamya magsimula ka ng mag-alay ng bulaklak sa paanan ko at himas-himasin ako ng panyo.  Hahaha.  Seriously, that’s the reason why I told (and shown you) some of my bad side.  Now you know I’m just human… with strength and weaknesses just like you.  And if you find me great, you can be like that too.  Btw, anong rafe ang pinagsasabi mo?  Wahahaha.

Gullible Goblin

Hehe what can I say… sinusulat ko to ng kaharap ka.  Hehehe.  Nasabi ko na yata sau ang lahat during late night talks at tuwing mag-aaway bati tayo, hahaha.  The three months is like a hardwood for us.  It took time to alight, but burns brighter and last longer.  Thank you.  I will just remind you, wag masyadong magpaka-loner.  And YOU are what you decide to become.  Life is an endless search of self-discovery.  Wag kang matakot sa realizations, at magchange when it calls you.

Worthless Mammal

You’re the first and the only MYMAN.  Kala ko hindi mo matatagalan ang pagiging bossy, pasaway at pagiging spoiled ko.  Salamat sa pagpe-prepare ng early breakfast at midnight snack.  Sa pagpapainom ng gamut pag may sakit ako.  Sa pagremind ng everything, from sleeping schedule, drinking time-outs, financial assessment, intimate dates at kung ano-ano pang paglook-after na nagawa mo.  The three months would be unimaginably terrible without you.  At kahit hindi ko binabanggit, you know naman I appreciate it very much.  Domo Arigato Gozaimasu.

 

Sa mga hindi ko nabanggit, salamat sa mga time na nagpapatintero tau sa ulan, sa mga kalaro ko ng balikbayan, sa mga poker players (nabusog ako sa tubig), sa pusoy-dos (buti hindi permanent ang uling sa mukha), sa boxing, tennis, bowling at golf (iuuwi ko na ang wii, hehehe).  Sa mga kainuman, kakulitan, kabolahan.  Sa mga sakit sa ulo, sa mga nagregalo.

The evaluation says our sponsors are “almost satisfied”.  For me, that’s tantamount to failure.  Pero katulad nga ng sinasabi ko sa inyo, success as the world measures it is too easy.  We chose what is harder to come by.  We chose meaning in our lives.  Dahil as what our program shown, we achieve a Total and Meaningful Shipboard Experience.

I have faith in you to continue fanning the flames.  Lets raise our industry as a Whole.

Farewell Messages

i've been away for mmmoonnntthhss now.  i was not able to blog sa gitna ng laot because of my previous project. 

so, this is my first blog after that 3 month project, and its not even about that...

it's about those people, in a short time, grew up with me.  hope u'll not be offended na ipo-post ko ang farewell messages nyo sa kin.  Starting with:

"The certain end is near
and the parting time I fear
Thank you sir for us all
the experiences, imparting knowledge
and above all, the genuine relationship
we've nurtured.  Salamat Sir Miko.
This may be the end, but at the rear behind
all these, there you are, with holding your
unperishable teachings as we go ascend.
-------------Laguna Boy

"Ehem sir! emo un nasa taas, di ko kaya gumawa ng ganyan.  gusto ko lang sabihin na life is suffering because of other people.  (walang mag-eexam kung walang magpapaexam).  hehehe.  pero ok lang, pinatatag ako ng mga pagsubok.  bumagsak man o hindi, i'm still here and ready to face the next challenge.
But the most important thing is, pinakita mong hindi kami iba sau.  nagkamali ka lang siguro sa pagpili ng myman mo.  hahaha.  un lang, salamat sa mga bagong kaalaman at kasabihan.  no goodbyes sir.  till next time.
-------------Mr. C

"Veritas. Liberabit, vos"  the truth shall st you free.  thank you sir, for enligthening me how legacy defines the purpose of life.  you let me realized that the rose is not beautiful wtihout its thorns.  Thank you.  au revoir.
------------Posh

"Miko.san.
Salamat dahl nakilala kita sa maikling panahon even to you rafe me sometimes.  i really appreciate.  Thank you so much for everything.
Dapat makikita pa tayo" Ok!!!
-------------Stupid Monster

It's not one great deed that proves your importance...
It's the little good things that you impart day by day that counts.
3 months might be short, but ur impact will last long
-------------Wii Legend

and finally, but not the least:

"I won't say goodbye, i won't say i will miss you, all i can say is thank you.  for 3 months nagkasama tayo, nagkakwentuhan, nagkatabi sa pagtulog, kasama sa mga gimiks lalo na sa mga first experience ko together with you na never in my life ko malilimutan, and i know its not the end at marami pa tayo pagsasamahan.  i will not be around you for awhile but our hearts will be connected forever.  Thank you.
-------------Gullible Goblin

 

yan na lang.  hahaha.  ung farewell ko sa kanila on my next blog post.